Friday, April 1, 2011

#228-Jesus, the Drug and the Holy Ghost Infilling Announcer...




First, the post on grace, and liberals and other stuff that i promised is still coming. It's just in two of the posts I sounded like a pastor. And a pastor is the last thing I ever wanted to be. I was using words like justification, and grace and discussing Paul's theology, and it was just very uncomfortable for me. I need time to adjust...as I compromise my position and values...

Anyways, In the meantime, I remember a message as I was growing up, both in church, and on television (yes, I was one of those kids who was raised amongst episodes of the Simpsons and violent video games)...

The message was kind of obvious....



So all they thought they needed to do to keep us from doing drugs was crack an egg over a pan, and somehow we were supposed to take them at their word, that if you ever do drugs.... the next thing you know...

Your head will be broken up and you'll see you're brain scattered all over the cement in your last moments on earth, because you did drugs...

Or it got a little more complex...



Because now there were cartoon turtles telling us to not do drugs.

In church, it was a little more refined....

It went something to the effect of a middle aged man, telling us of his days in the world in Sunday School Class...

The strange man would elegantly speak on matters of his past, and the drugs he did, and the depression he found himself in. There would usually end up being some breakdown at the lowest of low points....perhaps the man tried committing suicide or he nearly overdosed, or Satan came and talked to him during one of his drug trips.....


All of this is right and well...

Drugs aren't good. The World is not good. Sin is terrible.

But then usually, in the testimonies, there would be a twist towards the end...

The Twist was something to the effect of Holy Ghost/Jesus being a better high than all the drugs they tried in the world...

God is the best of all Possible Drugs?


So thus when I was 9, every other kid in my Sunday School Classes was speaking in tongues like it was the easiest thing in the world, and there were pats on the back after the 5 or 6 year olds sobbed their little eyes and the nearby mother's bobbed their head in approval.

There was of course the Sunday School teacher all the kids loved, and it was that person usually designated to be the Holy Ghost Infilling Announcer...they would find the kids who appear on the brink of Holy Ghost Party in their Belly...and when that kid was selected (only the ones who had not spoken in tongues before), the announcer would bend down as if to descend like an Angel into the Holy Ghost Inferno waiting to happen.... (because when you're a kid, loved Sunday School Teachers are bigger than angels)...

.And when you, the praying child would stand there in the altar wondering how much longer this thing has to go on until the parents will be satisfied by your prayerful effort or until God finally remembers He had an appointment to enter into you 15 minutes ago and He is SOOO Late!...So when you wonder these thoughts for the 100th time in prayer you crack your eye lids open after wondering how much longer you gotta stand here, and you see that that LOVED SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHER is praying with you. There isn't a better motivator to seek GOd for all he's worth than seeing your favorite Sunday School Teacher's ear right in front of you with a smile the size of Texas across his face...

And kids would seem to go through this routine weekly....

And i was perplexed because i would run through this gauntlet on a monthly basis (usually whenever there was a visiting preacher because "visiting preacher" means "stronger God" for some reason), and I would not feel my tongue move one rumble outside of my own will...

but nonetheless i did know that when I got the Holy Ghost, and spoke in tongues I would experience the BIGGEST High of my life because that weird ex-druggier teacher told me the greatest drug in life is God... and God, the Drug, is LEGAL! Meaning I, little 9 year old me, wouldn't even get in trouble for trying that stuff...

Except when I finally got the H.G. (that's "Holy Ghost"), it was cool....

But i can assure you, my mental state did not ever enter into "Trip mode...."

The Holy Ghost got me a lot of approval amongst church folk, but I assure you....it was nothing close to what i imagined the greatest drug ever would be like...

So by the time I was ready to taste the world and I found out that the World wasn't completely "valueless" in terms of the resulted happiness and fun...

I was so ticked off at ex-druggie Sunday School Teacher, because the world was in fact fun....

And the vices of the world, in terms of the buzz I felt was greatly in "feeling" than the Holy Ghost....

And I didn't have to wait at the altar for a half hour to "feel anything."

This was the lie of my youth: The World-Not Fun. The Church-Fun.

So when I test the worldly waters, and find out they're fun, I very easily acknowledged that by comparison, the church was not fun whatsoever.

And I backslid, because some ex druggie turned Sunday School teacher had mistaken the high he felt in getting the Holy Ghost as what Christianity was about....

Oh but he was SOOO Wrong!

And this would be my message him back then if I knew then what I know now:



And this is not a rant against the Holy Ghost whatsoever. Because when you meet me i will talk your head off about the theoretical/Pauline implications of being baptized, and getting the Holy Ghost if you ask...

And nor am I saying that when the sunday school teacher, ex-druggie got the Holy Ghost, he didn't really feel as good as he said he did. No.

What I am saying and asking is, why are we putting the Holy Ghost and Christianity in conversation with the vices of the world, in terms of "which has a better buzz?"

The Holy Ghost is not a drug.

The Holy Ghost (although I could be mistaken) is never talked about in the Bible in terms of "Feeling."...or "the greatest happiness in the world." Or something to that effect.

Christianity is completely different and on a different plane than the drugs and vices of the World. And partly because I was raised as Christianity being "the best" drug/happiness/lifestyle/fun on earth, I got out of their so quick when I realized that in my own honest experience, the drugs/happiness/lifestyles/fun of the world were better than that of the claims of Christianity...

It was only when I realized that Christianity is not about comparison or "the better of the two options" but rather is on an entirely different foundation (e.g. God dying on the cross and resurrecting), then I could begin to "unlearn" the Holy Ghost as a drug, and relearn Christianity proper....


6 comments:

  1. Yes, bad preaching that. Paul was pounding on Corinth for using their worldly mindset to think about Christianity. It doesn't work.

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  2. I understand all you are saying in this post (good one, by the way), but are you also saying you continue to hold to the necessity of tongues for salvation? I'm confused just a little. In no way do I want to argue about it. I find it tiresome and I know what the Bible teaches about it. Just curious if this is still your stance.

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  3. Commonly used phrase at camps/youth rallies:
    "This is better than any drug! This is better than any drink!"

    However:

    DrinkingYouth rallies.

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  4. that should have read:

    Drinking < Jesus
    Drugs < Jesus

    Being Inebriated > Youth Rallies

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  5. Grace,

    I don't know my precise stance regarding initial evidence. I dont know many preachers who would argue that if you don't speak in tongues, you are going to hell.

    That is certainly not my stance either.

    I would say that in the Book of Acts, tongues are normative as the sign. I also believe tongues is the result and not the cause of salvation.

    I do think there is something theologically significant that happens in the exact tongues act, and Romans 8 shows definitely some hints towards that significance. The point is, in most denominations wherein tongues is no longer the signifier of the infilling of the Holy Ghost (e.g. the assemblies of God), tongues is now spoken by less than 10 percent of people. And I don't think that's how God intended it.


    I hate a Christianity that is deemed easy. I hate a Christianity that bases itself in salvation and not in reconciliation. I hate soft Christianity. And I think more than ever, people are embarrassed of tongues (not saying you Grace), and I absolutely hate that.

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  6. great to know that you don't know many preachers in the UPC that believe if you don't speak in tongues you are going to hell. A lot has changed in 20 years. Who knew? Christianity is not easy. The way is narrow and few will enter. But it is just not as narrow as many believe. Christians continue to be martyred and persecuted. I expect persecution in the coming years. I have many "liberal" (not the liberal type you speak of) who actually mock me when I speak about Jesus. They go to church but are embarrased to speak of Him outside of the church. Some don't even claim to believe and mock me. It's not easy. And believing in grace, etc...doesn't make it any easier. I wish I had more time to get my thoughts relayed, but alas I am off.

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