Thursday, September 3, 2009

#13-Sunday Night Restaurant Invasion

Common practice amongst Apostolics, especially in youth and young adult demographic, is to raid a restaurant in packs of 20-30 people following a service.

The drill goes down as follows:

  • After a service has concluded, the youth of the church will congregate in the pews of the sanctuary to “fellowship” (hang out). They talk at length about any given subject. This can go one for up to one hour after the service has concluded (ignoring the idea that the conversations could also take place at the future dining destination).
  • At some point, someone will throw out dining possibilities for the group. The debate as to where to eat can take up to several minutes.
  • Once a destination has been chosen, the group slowly makes its way to the foyer. Inevitably, the group makes contact with someone else or other youth. The foyer stay also can last up to several minutes.
  • Once the foyer stage is passed, the next hurdle is making it out of the parking lot. This subject has been thoroughly covered in post #3 in this blog.
  • Finally, the group makes it to the restaurant. Arrival time is commonly within 15-30 minutes of closing time causing restaurant staff to be agitated. The Apostolic youth boldly inform the hostess that they need seating for 20-30 people together. The energy of the Apo youth tends to climax at this point. Speaking loudly, raucous behavior, and general rudeness prevail. Inside jokes such as pretending to speak in tongues and exaggerated singing are known to occur. The group is seated and the aforementioned behavior continues.
  • Large portions of food are ordered.
  • Separate checks are requested.
  • After the group concludes the meal, they prolong their banter by obliviously ignoring the restaurant staff’s desire to clean up and leave work.
  • The night of wholesome, Godly fellowship usually concludes with stingy tips. This practice is also rampant at Apostolic conferences (a subject which I am sure will be covered at some point).

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