Wednesday, September 2, 2009


Ah yes, the ultimate in Pentecostal contradiction. We can't go to movie theaters (most of us), so we settle for the next best, most similar but actually better thing: the IMAX. Upon logic which we do not even know, we say the evil demons and make-out tendencies that make movie theaters so bad are in no way present in IMAX theaters.

IMAX is in fact the movie theater's steroid-using stronger little brother that somehow slipped underneath the Apostolic sin-radar in the name of education. That's right, since IMAX began initially in science only museums and showed only scientific films one can easily see why the IMAX was so permissible.

And naturally us as Apostolics took IMAX up on it's full potential value as something that allowed us to feel like we could be normal teenagers on Friday evening by watching a film in a theater-like complex. Except we watched the nerdy films about space and Mt. Everest, but outside of that, IMAX was the perfect not-sinful, yet sinfully similar movie theater loophole.

But that is not where the story ends....In recent years, the IMAX has become a movie theater institution. It has shown every secular film from Star Wars to Dark Knight to the Watchmen, but we don't want to tell our pastors this breakthrough. So we stick to the 1990's declaration of IMAX's being okay, despite the IMAX being everything a movie theater is except with a bigger screen.

O believe you me young reader, I am with you....I will live and die in this IMAX paradigm until I die. When "Where the Wild Things Are" comes out on October 16 I will scoff at anyone I hear going to see it in movie theaters, but will happily watch the same film on a bigger screen in a science museum in complete happiness and innocence that same day.

(please note that I am open to any and all suggestions which can be emailed to me at

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